Respecting Husbands ~

I pray you are all doing well today 🙂 This is a small portion of a tract that I was re-reading this week and it arrested my attention again and I wanted to share it with you. Truly this is an area where wives are struggling today, I believe. Our enemy would like nothing more than to defeat us in this area of our marriages and in our homes. My prayer today is that we would all take a fresh look at respecting the wonderful man has given each of us ( or will give us, for single girls ) and to truly give him honor and respect today. Also, God loves a repentant heart: I encourage you to repent if you need too, I know I have.
I love you all ~

Sincerely yours ,
Teresa Haley


taken from – The Duties of Husbands and Wives by Richard Steele, Puritan

This is her special qualification. If she has all beauty and learning but no respect for her husband, she is not a good wife.
Even if she is the sweetest thing and her husband is the meanest, she still has a duty to respect him.
First, she must fix her heart that her position is inferior to his, and then she will be able to fulfill all respect implies with ease and delight.
It is not fitting to set the rib above, or even on the same level with the head.

HOW ????
~She highly esteems him.
~Ponder the excellence of his person, and value it properly.
~Dearly love him.
~Diligently please him.
~The word “respect” in Ephs. 5:33 means “fear”.
~Maintain chaste conduct around him.
~Her submission is to be like the church to Christ’s submission.
~In everything, great and small, agreeable and disagreeable to her.
~The wife should submit to her husband as if there were but one will in their two hearts.
~Grudging obedience is unacceptable, and usually springs from her unmortified pride and self-conceit.
~It is better for you to do your duty, and leave his judgment to God.
~She speaks respectfully of him in his absence.

Be careful with interrupting him while he is speaking.
Silence commends a woman’s wisdom more than speech.
The wise woman uses words wisely.
Beware of using a disrespectful tone or words.
Strive for a gentle and quiet spirit.
No woman gets honor by having the last word.

Some woman argue that their tongue is their only weapon, but the wise know that their tongue is set on fire by hell (James 3:6)
She asks his counsel and hears his reproofs.

Her hardest task is in hearing a reproof lovingly and thankfully, especially if she has a proud and contentious spirit.
So to answer him harshly for reproof shows great ingratitude.

If she really respects him, this will be a much easier pill to swallow.


Some will disregard all this counsel with the excuse that none can attain it, but this mocks God. He will punish all such. If His vengeance does not meet you in this life, as it often does the rebellious, then it will in another. A true Christian is marked by a fundamental submission to biblical counsel; without this, you are mere hypocrites.

Richard Steele, Puritan

Published in: on April 20, 2010 at 4:36 pm  Comments (2)  

2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Yeah, this is an ongoing struggle. I outwardly respect him. My children respect him because I respect him. Something is missing though. Inwardly I don’t always.:(

    • Bless you for honoring the Word of the Lord. Great will be your reward!!!

      Thank you for your comment !!

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